Lesson 1: PRAY

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My REAL FRIENDS!

My real friends!! is something that I really miss feeling for quite a while.I dont care if its me the reason or anybody else but I just missed the presence of TRUE people in my life that love me really...I miss the love and care of a friend not the feeling that my attitudes and expressions are always watched and judged by my friends. I miss a friend who really feels me important to their lives, I miss a friend who would really tender and patient, I miss a friend who really understands me and stop judging my actions from behind and spreading my mistakes and failures, I miss a friend who feels deeply happy for my success and deeply sad for my loss, I miss a friend who appreciates my presence in their lives, I miss a friend who would make my happy, I miss a friend who wants my help, I miss a friend who could listen to me without giving judgements and blaming for my past mistakes, I miss a friend who simply gives me hope that I could do something, I miss a friend who pushes me forward, I miss a friend who is not jealous, I miss a friend who is so true even with himself, I miss a friend with one face not with hundreds of different faces, I miss a loyal friend, I miss a friend who knows that I am a senstive person and would respect my feelings, I miss a friend who NEVER changes through time, I miss a friend who bears me and my problems, I miss a friend who is not LYING, I miss a friend who is so supportive and tell you can do it, I miss a friend who I never get embaressed from, I miss a friend who would clear my tears and tell me "dont worry, everything is ust gonna be fine", I miss a friend who is not so harsh with me, I miss a friend who could say I am sorry, I miss a friend who loves me for who I AM, I miss a friend when he/she is upset with me would tell me, I miss a friend who would let me breath, I miss a friend who wouldnot always show something he/she doesnt feel, I finally MISS a friend whom I am Simply Myself with!!!

What I want to tell you that I found those people that complile all those lovely things that I miss.They just appeared at the right time of my life when I simply NEEDED a TRUE friend. I promise You I will value your presence in my life so much but as well please never LET me down.I am sure you will not! LOVE YOU!

Dedicated to My beloved Best Friends

Marina, Tony and Yousha

Unorganized thoughts about "Memories"...

A week ago I had a discussion with a woman I really love, we simply talked about ''memories''. It touched alot of things inside me I am trying to hide inorder not to feel that hard feeling inside of me especially when some special events wont be repeated again in my life.U just feel like I miss those days, I miss those people, I miss those lovely moments BUT I no more want them in my life or they no more fit with who I am now. Sometimes tears would really fall deeply not from my eyes but from my heart when I miss an old friend especially this friend was someone so like me. They fall when u remember how someone thought you are so close to him/her and appreciated u so much one day but it all went with the wind. The loss that Happened to me the last period of my life was extremly too much that I burst but after I am now "Me", I look to the many people I lost and the many opportunities I missed, It really hurts HOWEVER it never let me down.It gives me hope to use the coming period to just regain the past again.It is like nothing is impossible. Sometimes I think why I am not taking a real step forward towards some of those old people, some answers would pop up that generally I am a person who is not good at all in keeping in touch with others but much answers that simply I could no more trust them as before. It is like I feel we lost the trust that was exchanged between us. You know, out of my modest experience I learnt that I could Build bridges of trust very quickly, time strengthens it but if those brigdes were broken, the hardest thing is to rebuild them and if they were rebuild they could never be as before. I learnt that If Someone was really special I should take care of so much not by so much calling and so much hanging out but by making him/her feel they are special to your life. Real friends are diamonds, really diamonds never break them because you will feel a real loss.

Nanis I want you from now on to remember those memories, just smile and say:
''Thank you God for giving me the chance to have some lovely memories in my life like that...and If they were hard ones thank you for giving me the chance to learn and go through a unique experience like that as well!"